As a people lover, a "people person", it really shits me when people assume my intentions, or put their own spin on them, in a negative way.
Maybe I should just put this out there, into the ether, into the vast complexity of the world wide web:
I only ever have the best of intentions, and I do my utmost to never hurt my friends and loved ones, usually at the cost of my own happiness and well-being.
Ok, so I had a conversation with Steve about intentions today, and I happened to say, (I believe I'm quoting myself here,)
"I don't believe in intentions." *
Yes, intentions don't really matter when what you're saying or doing is ALWAYS being perceived - constantly being run through a mind that is very different from your own, and importance or emphasis is being placed accordingly by that person's brain, not yours. So whatever you're intending, it won't always be perceived the way you want it to.
But the rest of it stands. I am forever concerned about not hurting anyone, and assuming that I am an immoral or hurtful person is one of the most painful things I could go through.
When you try your best to show people your heart, and they assume you're trying to dupe them, how can you not take that personally? How can you,in turn, not be hurt?
I don't know how to stop taking this shit personally.
*Incidentally, I got some very strange looks in the shops yesterday when I told Lily "I don't believe in bread."
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